As I reflect back on the last year of my life, I am amazed at how much God has moved in my life. I do not think anything could have prepared me for the monumental task that lie before me; motherhood. The love and support from my husband, family and friends has been overwhelming, and yet, if there is one lesson I have learned well, it is that the most important journey into motherhood must be discovered on one’s own. While there will always be tons of advice to be given, a mother must learn to trust her own instincts because what’s good for the goose is not always good for the gander. And so, I present to you my four cents worth to add to the pile of things that I wish I had known beforehand.
Battle of Clean vs. Messy
There is a difference between clean and messy. No, I am not talking about that hot mess of a makeup drawer that you probably have not touched in weeks if not months. That’s a whole other blog post. I am talking about your house. Yes, you know that place you sleep in occasionally, and I do mean occasionally.
Pre-motherhood if a single item in my home was out of place all pandemonium was let loose, OCD kicked into overdrive, and alarms were sounded until the item was delicately placed back in it’s appropriate spot. I imagine my home kind of looked like this.
Post-baby, well now that’s a different story. My home is always clean, and by that, I mean I just mopped yesterday, sorry you missed it. But, in all reality, I do keep a clean house, the floors are mopped, laundry is folded (sometimes), counter tops are wiped down, and dishes are kept in their continuous cycle of clean, dirty, clean, dirty, clean…anyway, you get the point.
My house may not look clean to you because it is what I call, messy. We share our home with a one year old, so toys may fall from the ceiling and bonk you in the head occasionally, just kidding. But, in all seriousness they are going to cover almost every inch of the floor because the moment I put the toy that he hasn’t played with in days in the toy box I can assure you the infatuation will be renewed, and he will pull it back out. Who wants to bet me a million dollars; be careful, I never place a bet I know I can’t win. You just need to trust that somewhere underneath that mountain of toys is a pristine floor that glitters like the Sistine chapel. If the site of this makes you uncomfortable, please feel free to leave.
Trust Your Gut
If your child isn’t feeling well, and the nurse on call says, “Mam, I understand your concern, but it’s just viral, and will pass in a few days”, but your stomach is in knots, and that still small voice deep inside of you is screaming, “NO IT’S NOT!”. Trust it, take your child to the doctor, hospital, or to whomever you think they need. If there’s one thing I can guarantee, you will be getting advice about your child for the rest of your life but no one and I mean no one knows your child like you do. God made us women for a reason, he instilled us with an intuition men can only dream of, sorry dears. You carried your baby for nine months before you gave birth and during that nine months your souls were knitting themselves together, forming a bond heaven nor hell can break apart. If you disagree, this blog post isn’t for you, and I strongly suggest you call your doctor immediately.
Poop or No Poop, That is the Question
Your life will most likely revolve around poop. The process starts in the hospital with the constant questions from the doctors and nurses. Has he had any dirty diapers today? How many dirty diapers has he had? How many wet diapers? What color was the dirty diapers? If your child is breastfed vs formula fed this number will vary, however, before you know it, you are tracking down poopy diapers like a blood hound. If your child is like mine and decides they are going to become constipated at one month old one missed dirty diaper and the whole house is on full alert. All I’m saying is, you haven’t lived until you are laying in bed with a prayer that starts with, Dear Heavenly Father, please let my child poop today.
Momma Bear on Duty
Alert, this is the part where I am not going to be politically correct, sorry, not sorry. Spoiler alert! You are going to make decisions for your child that affect their life and other people will not agree with you! Do yourself the favor and DO NOT feel the need to post it on Facebook and Instagram. A vaccine pro momma will be shredded by insults of the anti-vaccine momma who will swear you have now signed the death certificate for your child and they are guaranteed to have autism. I’m not siding with any one side ya’ll (I chose vaccines) but everyone is entitled to their own opinion so if you post it on social media you are going to hear that opinion.
As a mother, know that whatever decision you do make you need to stick by it and be prepared to defend it like the momma bear you are. If and when the time comes when someone feels the need to stick their nose in your business, and believe me they will, you have every right to tell them in a polite and sometimes a not so polite way to bug off!